Showing posts with label ass. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ass. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Freedom of Choice

I want to take a little time out to talk about what is somewhat a touchy subject in America. I want to discuss the first amendment. Now I don't want to have a debate about whether or not we should have the freedom of speech or not, I believe that the vast majority of us agree that freedom of speech is a great thing. Instead, I want to address how the first amendment makes some people act like A**holes. Yeah I said it, A**holes! (Well I guess that I technically didn't say it, but you catch my drift).

The First Amendment to the United States Constitution is part of the United States Bill of Rights that expressly prohibits the United States Congress from making laws "respecting an establishment of religion" (the Establishment Clause) or that prohibit the free exercise of religion (the Free Exercise Clause), laws that infringe the freedom of speech, infringe the freedom of the press, limit the right to peaceably assemble, or limit the right to petition the government for a redress of grievances. (From Wikipedia).

I was in the San Francisco Bay area last week, and I awoke to a story on the morning news that made me believe that I just had to still be asleep. I mean there's no possible way that this could ever happen. I will give you both the way that I heard the story, and then the actual story: The way I heard it, "Protesters have been cut off from both food and water. The protesters have been trying to prevent the University of California-Berkeley from tearing down trees in front of Memorial Stadium. A project that would enable the University to build an athletic center." My immediate reaction was, these people are crazy. Why the hell would they protest the city rebuilding the stadium? Well if I thought that was bad, the WHOLE story is so much worse.

Four jackasses climbed into a tree to protest the University tearing down forty-two trees surrounding Memorial stadium. And not only that, but the University allowed them to post up for 21 months! In those 21 months, construction was at a halt. The University spent an approximate twenty million dollars in legal fees, construction delays, and a hired police presence. And why? Because 4 idiots did not want trees torn down. I don't know about you, but I'm not wasting twenty million dollars to save some damn trees!

One thing that you need to understand about me is that I have very little tolerance for nonsense. And my solution may sound harsh, but it would have resolved this situation on day one. I would have made an announcement similar to this. "We are giving you twenty minutes to descend from that tree. If you don't, we are cutting it down"! Unless the protesters are the descendants of Tarzan, they would've had their asses on the ground in less than five minutes. See a part of the problem with this country is that we've gone soft like Twinkie filling. Back in the day, you couldn't act a fool like this, and not plan on suffering the repercussions of your actions. However in the 21st century America, there's plenty of opportunity to act a fool, and then claim some kind of victim status. In this situation, the only people who were victimized were the University, and the citizens of the state of California who paid the twenty million dollar tab.

In 2003, Rachel Corrie, a peace activist from Olympia, Washington, was protesting the destruction of Palestinian homes by the Isreali government. Isreali Army bulldozers were brought in to handle the demolition. Rachel's brilliant idea to stop the demolition was to stand in the direct path of the bulldozer. Well unlike in America, the bulldozer did its job. Unfortunately in the process, Rachel was hit by the bulldozer. She later died from her injuries. Now as unfortunate as it is that Rachel lost her life, to me this is just an example of how some Americans don't understand that you can't just protest in any fashion that you choose. There can be serious consequences to your actions.

Now there is a story that captivated the country back in 1994. An American teen was caught spray painting and throwing eggs at cars. The crime was committed by then 18 year old Michael Faye of St. Louis, Missouri. I'm sure you're probably thinking that little Michael was sentenced to community service where he had to wear an orange jump suit and pick up trash on the freeway. Well the missing piece of information is that little Michael committed his crime in Singapore. And what did he get sentenced to? (Come on, you remember the story). They beat his ass with a cane! (Now you remember it right)?

Little Michael was sentenced to six strokes with a ratan. The ratan is an 8 foot long stick of bamboo. It is described to be absolute torture to any individual subjected to any amount of lashes from it. Once sentenced, there was a public outcry in America that the punishment was entirely too harsh. President Bill Clinton even appealed to Singapore's government on little Michael's behalf. Singapore responded in kind and lowered the amount of strokes that Michael would receive from six to four, as a sign of respsect to Bill. (Way to stand up Singapore, I like the guts).

Well to conclude the story, let's just say that Singapore beat that ass! LMAO. Little Michael moved back to the United States, where he would go on to have other brushes with the law. I guess he needed to be somewhere were the punishments were less severe.

I say tell this story to further illustrate that we as a nation need to start standing up and saying that we aren't gonna take this crap. Too often, we are punished/victimized by individuals who are doing nothing more than acting a damn fool. Freedom of speech is not a license to do as you will. I respect the right to assemble in public, and yes, to even shout, hold signs, and any other creative ways that you can think of to get your point across. But when you start laying down in the street, climbing and sitting in trees, you've gone entirely too far. And if the consequence to you doing things such as that is to get run over by a bulldozer, or falling yo ass out of a tree, hey then so be it. As my father used to say, "assumption of risk." And to the Federal Government, Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but an ass whoopin ain't never hurt nobody. Maybe we need to follow Singapore's lead. Just ask little Michael.

-DrizaDre-

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Black Ice

We've all done it. Tripped, and immediately looked around to see if anyone saw us. As a guy, you pray that you won't turn around and see the most beautiful woman you've ever seen in your life.


(And to the Man that has, I feel terrible for you. Holla at me, the next round is on me).


Well, I saw the most extreme example of that today. And it got me to thinking, why do we all fall victim to what I will call:

"Idon'twantanyonetoseemefallitis."

Now surprisingly, its not contagious. Either you have it or you're immune. But I must say that finding someone without it is as rare as a gay Man with a Playboy subscription. (I guess in his case, it really is for the articles. Lol).

Here's why so many of us suffer from

"idontwantanyonetoseemefallitis."

(Or as I will call it for the remainder of the blog, IDWATSMFI). BAD ASS KIDS!!!!!!!!!! (Think Nelson from the Simpsons. "HaHa"). Now you may ask yourself, how do Bad ass kids factor into this? I didn't see any Bad ass kids around the last time I tripped, and I still felt my IDWATSMFI flaring up. Well those Bad ass kids that we worry about are not actual adolescents, they are a part of what exists within most of us. And they just need the right moment to emerge from within all us. Well, my inner Bad ass kid emerged yesterday.

In the interest of not snitching, some elements of the story have been changed to protect the DUMBASS!

I was driving down a freeway here in the United States that has a couple 1s in the number. Now, there may or may not have been construction going at the time. (Stop Snitchin ya'll, this is how you do it). Well, I'm on this unnamed freeway, when I happened to look to my right, and noticed a mode of transportation coming up at a high rate of speed. (Could've been a car, or a horse with a full head of steam. Again in the spirit of not snitchin, you use your imagination). Now, this mode of transportation disappeared in front of the vehicle in front of me. Next thing I know, the vehicle in front of me slams on the brakes. I too slam on the brakes. Suddenly, the unnamed mode of transportation hit what could have been a construction barrier or fence for horses to jump. (Are ya'll understanding how to not snitch yet? Vagueness). It comes back into traffic and rests on the on ramp. As we are all sitting there waiting to see if the person is alright, the mode of transportation takes off. (I guess that's why they call it horsepower).

Now this mode of transportation is showing definite signs of trauma from this impact, but this individual is going full steam ahead. I'm traveling at a reduced rate of speed, stunned by the fact that this person is still moving. And it wasn't just me, I could see the faces of many people in their vehicles. Some laughing, others with looks of settled anxiety. Well intelligent people, needless to say, that person didn't make it far. A couple miles down, there he was on the side of the road. (Either the car stopped working, or the horse needed a drink of water. You be the judge).

Well, as I passed him, my inner Bad ass kid came out. I looked at him, and had to smile. Instantly, I understood why the guy took off. He was trying to avoid having to expose himself to the very same people who saw his calamity.

So why the extreme? Why do we as grown ass adults care so much? Well, I believe that as children, we all probably fell into one of two categories. Either you were the kid who got teased, or you were the kid doing the teasing. And no matter what side of it you were on, that experience has inevitably put you on guard. Every time you trip, slip, have food that falls out of your mouth, drool, you are just hoping to not have to suffer the torment of someone's inner Bad ass kid.

I don't believe there will ever be a cure to IDWATSMFI. I'm sure that as you were reading this, your inner bad ass kid had a laugh or two. Lets just say that we just had a discussion of one of life's dirty secrets. And to the guy who I saw on that unnamed freeway, that shit was funny as
hell Man. I saw it all!


--drizadre--