Wednesday, July 9, 2008

New World Water

So I'm sitting in my room last night, about to go to sleep when I hear an unmistakable sound. It couldn't be! Not possible! I get up, and look out the window. No F-ing way! I quickly try and throw some clothes. Get my shorts on. (No shirt still). Is it done? I look back outside, damn, its still there. Throw a shirt on, throw my shoes on. Now its been at least 45 seconds. Is it over? Gotta look one more time. Damn, its still there. I race downstairs, go to the back porch. AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! I make it just in time to enjoy sweet raindrops.

Now some of you may be thinking, this fool is trippin. Well, just to let those of you know, I recently moved to Phoenix, Arizona. And what I experienced was a little slice of heaven sent down from God himself. See, I've lived in Los Angeles probably half my life. I know that some of you may have heard the Tony! Toni! Tone! song "It Never Rains (in Southern California)", but that's not entirely the truth. See it rarely rains in Southern California. Well, if 3T ever decides to make a comeback, I personally give them permission to use the title "It Never Rains (in Phoenix, Arizona). (They really don't have to change any of the words, it still sounds about right).

What do we all know about Phoenix? Yes, its 100 degrees consistently out here. But one of the little discussed aspects of being in a place like this is the lack of rainfall. And I don't know if you're like me or not, but Summers include just a tad bit of precipitation. Growing up in Chicago, you'd get at minimum, during the summers, a few days in which it would rain for maybe an hour or so. Just long enough to cool things off, give you time to grab a sandwich, and make your way back outside to finish playing. Not in Phoenix! From about 7am until the sun begins to fade around 7pm, all you get is blistering heat. Soul agonizing, make you wanna personally peel your own skin off heat. Or to piggyback what my brother has previously mentioned, "make you wanna slap somebody" heat.

Inevitably, I had to do some research on Phoenix's climate, and the facts were astounding. Trust me, it doesn't make me feel good knowing that I'll be here for the foreseeable future. The all-time record high temperature in Phoenix is 122 degrees set back in 1990. (The all-time high recorded in Baghdad,Iraq is also 122 degrees). The temperature reaches or exceeds 100 degrees on average 89 days per year. That's basically 1/4 of the calendar. The average annual rainfall is a scant 8.3 inches per year.

So now that you have the background information about Phoenix's climate, let me ask you a question. How does the weather affect you where you live? Do you complain about it being too hot? Do you feel like it rains too much? Well, trust me, the grass is definitely greener where you are. (Partly because its so hot out here that grass really doesn't grow). Hopefully reading this will make appreciate where you are just a little bit more. And for that rainfall that I experienced last night, I made it to the porch just in time to sit down, and the rainfall came to an end. So 3 minutes of rain. I'm gonna guess that was maybe .1 of our yearly total. (Hell, maybe more than that. Kinda scary actually). And of course, I wake up this morning to 90 degrees and sunshine. (85% of Phoenix's days in a year are sunny). Its alright though, come December, I'll appreciate that sunshine and lack of precipitation! But if its 100 degrees on Jesus' birthday, God is just gonna have to forgive me because I will be using some obscenities to describe how I feel.

This has been your weather update, I'm Dallas Rains, or Amy Freeze (or whatever corny Weather person name) signing off!


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