Karma = B**ch?

"Because karma, karma, karma comes back to you harder." - Lauren Hill "Lost Ones."

"But that karma is a bitch you steady asking God why." - Talib Kweli "Memories Live."

We've all heard the sayings above when it comes to the dreaded karma. However, I often sit back and think about my life and some of the things I've been through and done. At times that leads me to wonder is this karma thing real? I mean like anyone in life I've done some things in life that I consider to be bad. I'm not going to go through a list, but you can trust and believe it's the truth. But when I think about those actions and think about whether or not I was paid back by karma I can't always correlate the two.

Alright I'm sure you're awaiting at least one example. Well as a youth I wasn't always the model of outstanding citizenship I try to be today. LoL. Let's just say that running with the wrong crowd will get you to doing the wrong things 9 times out of 10. Now I'm quite sure the statute of limitations on vandalism has past; however, in an effort to not snitch nor self incriminate myself I'll just say this. Broken pieces of a spark plug hurled at a car window can shatter it. Now based off of karma and it's creed one day I should come out of work or my apartment and find my car windows busted out right? Yep like Jazmine Sullivan herself had just came out the studio after recording the song and my car was the first she saw.

**Side Note: I wonder if there has been an increase of random acts of vandalism and car windows being busted out since the release of that song? I guess I can ask the same for random engagements happening since Beyonce' and the "Single Ladies" anthem. But that's all for a different blog.**

Back to karma. Now thank God I've never had to experience this, but then again I'm still fairly young in age. Therefore, I guess karma doesn't have a time line of when it strikes either. Right? Or does it just mean that karma doesn't necessarily pay you back in an "eye for an eye" kind of way? I mean bad fortune is bad fortune regardless of how you look at it. I just walked outside and my car tire on my car is flat. Now the window wasn't busted. However, it's probably 15 degrees at best outside right now and I have to go and change and put on my spare tire. Then pay to get a new tire tomorrow. So could this be karma rearing it ugly little head? Hmmm I wonder.

Now when it comes to karma I'm always reminded of a TV show that I love to watch. I'm probably one of the few black people in the world that watch it, but I was instantly pulled in from the pilot episode. The show My Name is Earl deals directly with karma. The lead character earl was an overall bad person. He basically hooked and crooked his way through life on a daily basis. Until one day he scratched off a lottery ticket (which he stole) and won $100,000. Well the very next moment he runs outside of the liquor store in celebration and BAM!! He's hit by a car. The lotto ticket blows away and Earl is stuck in the hospital with serious injuries. While in the hospital something on TV reveals the laws of karma to him. This then prompts him to create and write down a list of all of the bad things he's done in life. Once out of the hospital, he sets out to make up for and to all the people he's done wrong to in his lifetime. Upon completing the first item on the list, the unthinkable happens. Yep! The lottery ticket magically finds it's way back to Earl. Convinced that this is only the act of karma Earl sets out on these wild adventures to complete all of the items on his list.

Don't worry I don't work for NBC or anything and I wasn't trying to sell anyone on that show. LoL. But, it is relevant to the topic at hand. I mean on some real talk I've had people do some truly wrong things to me in life; however, to be honest I have never wished karma's wrath on them. I mean I've been lied to, cheated on, stolen from, and so much more. Likewise, I've probably done some equally wrong things and had the worst wished upon me for those things. Yet I try to leave those things in the past and attempt to lead a life that presently is filled with doing things that for the most part are good.

Although none of us are without sin, we all know the old saying "Why do bad things happen to good people?" I can think of people in my life that at least in my lifetime, I have never seen do any wrong. Take my grandmother for example. Since I was old enough to remember she has always been that person that just helped any and everyone she could. She has always been very religious and went to church every Sunday. When she stopped being able to get to church she still paid her tithes. Now of course she had her ways that may have annoyed people, but overall she is a caring and loving person. She is one of those people that when you think about who's going to heaven it's just no question that her name is already written in the book. I mean you name it she will do it for you if she loves you, cares for you, or even if she just feels God is telling her to do it. You're down on your luck and need a place to stay, don't worry you can stay with granny. You need to borrow money, of course granny will lend it to you. You need advice, prayer, a babysitter, a meal, you name it and she would do it for you. Sadly, I've seen people steal from her for no reason at all. Because if they really needed the same amount of money they stole she would give it to them no questions asked.

Well in recent years my grandmother's situation hasn't been the best at all. Horrible things have happened. From her health deteriorating, to losing the house she owned for over 40 years (the house I grew up in as a child pictured to the left. It pains me to drive past the house and see how it looks now). When this happened no one was there nor in a position to help her. Including her own church which she gave only God knows how much money to over 40 + years. (Again that's a different blog entirely). I wasn't trying to make this a sob story, but I say all that to ask was this karma's wrath eventually catching up with her? I mean I've heard stories that my grandmother wasn't always a holy individual. So, was this the payback that she may have been avoiding all those years?

Honestly, I really don't know the answers to all the questions I asked in this post. I know I kept mentioning karma, but I think it simply alludes to the fact that there is a higher power. Therefore, we all need to do better and at least attempt to live our lives to a higher standard. No one is or can be perfect and will fall short of his grace. I'm by far not the most religious person at all. But I like to think that good deeds are rewarded with blessings. And well in contrast nothing good can come from bad deeds. Unfortunately, there are some people do wrong all the time and seem to still live far better then those that constantly do good. But I go on doing good knowing that there always has to be a balance in the universe. Not that I wish bad on anyone, but I guess eventually things will shape out and those bad deeds will never go unpunished. Call it a bitch or whatever word you want to use. Either way I guess that's just karma for you.

P.S. I wrote this with thoughts of someone that recently did me extremely wrong. They left me in a horrible situation knowing they could have easily done something to help. I'm not sure if they still read this blog or not. I could easily say I hope karma repays you for doing me wrong. But regardless just know that I don't have it in me to hate you for what you've done to me over this stretch of time. So with that said I don't wish bad upon you at all. I know you've been through much in the last year, so in fact, I hope and pray for you and your family. I pray that this year for you will be a 180 from last year. And not that you're concerned or worried about me anyway, but I'll always be alright in the end. So no hard feelings.

--C-Recks--

Diamonds Are Forever??

I was listening to the radio last week and a caller called in saying how much she adores her boyfriend, how great of a guy he is, and how much she was in love with him, etc. Well she went on to say how they're now talking about getting engaged. She then explained that the rings he was looking at just weren't flashy enough. And how she works for a big P.R. agency and she can't be seen with some small engagement ring.

Now I was married once and I remember when I proposed to my ex I was like 19 years old. I was going to school and working 2 jobs. I could barely afford to pay attention let alone the bills. So I would say the original ring I purchased and proposed with was maybe $300 at most. But it was what I could afford at the time. The next year I got a better job and prior to getting married upgraded the engagement ring to something that was more expensive. But it really really didn't make a difference about the ring because at the time we were so in love.

So I have a question: Is it the size of the ring? Or is it the love in your heart that really matters?

Or is it that the ring should be a reflection of the love?

Well each of you reading can formulate your own answers to the above questions. We all have our own opinions and I guess since I have the floor I'll share mines.

First off although it may not seem like it at times (based on some of my previous blog entries), I actually do believe in Real Love, marriage and all of the wonderful things that come along with it. So with that said I think it's a beautiful thing when a couple is in Real love and progress from dating, to engagement and eventually to marriage.

So with that said let's examine the ring. We know that the ring is a symbol of a woman's promise to give herself in marriage to the man in the future. Also, we have all heard the traditional price to spend on a ring is 2-3 months wages or salary. Well I have always heard this, but I never knew where this statement came from. Well according to Wiki this guideline originated from De Beers marketing materials in the early 20th century, in an effort to increase the sale of diamonds. So basically this guideline has to be one of the most successful and long running marketing schemes to date. In fact, the slogan "A Diamond is Forever" coined in 1947, was recently named as one of the best slogans of the 20th Century. So, 100 plus years later we're still going by De Beers guideline and increasing revenue for the diamond industry.

Now I'm not trying to approach this subject from a cheap man's perspective. I honestly feel like if you love the woman and truly want her to marry you then you should go all out and show her how much, but within reason. I feel like when purchasing a ring a man should take some things into consideration just like any other major purchase. And I'm sure we all agree that purchasing an engagement ring is a major purchase. So this is no different than purchasing a house or a car; therefore, you should consider a number of questions. For instance, can you really afford this ring? What if she doesn't accept? Then what is the return policy? How will you pay? Cash or credit? What about the wedding itself? Will you have to pay for the wedding? Or are you lucky enough to have her parents follow tradition and pay for the wedding?

"On average, US couples spend $28,732 for their wedding. However, the majority of couples spend between $14,366 and $35,915 while their wedding budget is typically 50% less than the amount spent. This does not include cost for a honeymoon or engagement ring." "The average cost of a diamond engagement ring is $3,500 to $4,000."

Although all men would love to propose with the biggest Flinstones' rock on her finger, sometimes it's just not feasible. Let's add a real world example. Recently singer Beyonce who's married to rapper Jay-Z openly discussed details of her marriage. "In eschewing tradition, Beyonce didn't want an engagement ring, as it is "just material and it's just silly to me." Instead, the lovebirds got matching tattoos on their ring fingers of the Roman numeral IV — a digit not only significant because of her wedding date. Beyonce was born Sept. 4; Jay-Z, Dec. 4. "What Jay and I have is real," she said." Now imagine that. Jay-Z can afford to buy anything he wants, including the most expensive engagement ring imaginable. Now to refer to the opening example, I would say that Beyonce has a much bigger image to keep up than the young lady at her little PR agency job.

All I can say is that in this economy knowing what I make I would hate to be in a relationship that is heading towards engagement. Unless I was lucky enough to have a woman that will say something like Beyonce I would seriously have to wait until I saved up enough money. However, I would potentially run the risk of being consider one of those guys that want the milk without paying for the Cow. So what is a guy to really do? But there are so many factors to consider when you're trying to choose that perfect engagement ring. Just know that if you don't represent correctly she probably won't be the person you hear it from. You should be more concerned about the external pressures. Yep you unfortunately you should be worrying about "what will so and so think of the ring?" She may even be fine with the inexpensive ring initially, but may quickly change once people get in her ear.

Her girls: "Girl it's nice and we happy for you and happy he finally popped the question lord knows we thought the day would never come, but damn all this time and that's as much as your man loves you? That ring is a lil' small aint it?"

The Scavengers: "So you say you engaged huh? Well I can't really tell from the ring you're wearing. If I was your Fiance' you'd be wearing a real ring."

Her Dad: "You know I don't really like the boy anyway. And if he can't even buy you a suitable ring then I can't understand how he's going to take care of you."

You can trust and believe that by the time all of them finish talking you'll be hoping that you haven't passed the 30 day return period yet. Bottom line is this I'm not hating on a man that can buy his potential wife a $25,000 ring or better. I'm simply saying when did the focus of love and marriage get switched to how much the ring you buy is worth? If I love you unconditionally then whether I'm rich or poor or somewhere in between that love is going to be the same. If I can't get you that 5 karat diamond engagement ring to begin with then I ask you to accept this 1 or 2 karat. I know that you're worth more than gold and diamonds. And I promise I will upgrade this ring as time goes on and as my income increases. But maybe that's just me.

Basically when I plan to get married again I want to have that Grandmother and Grandfather love. I don't know what happen but people have gotten away from that. You know your grandparents started out with basically nothing but love, that is if they even got an engagement ring back then. But your grandfather did what he could when he could and eventually got her a ring and by time we were old enough to know grandma had a beautiful wedding ring. But as much as they went through they still had that Real Love. That unconditional Love. No matter how bad things got or what flaws the other person had they still stuck it out and took "til death do us part" to heart. So if you have that type of Love, then the type of ring you have doesn't matter, nor does any other material thing. Because you can't put a price on love. I'm just saying, I'd rather have Love that's forever than a diamond that is supposedly forever.

But as for the subject at hand. However you feel about the engagement ring I just feel like it's a conversation that each individual couple should discuss. Communication is key. Make sure you're on the same level when it comes to engagement, proposal and marriage. If you know that your potential fiance' will want an expensive ring then you better get on the grind and start saving for that ring. Or perhaps you can use Jay-Z and Beyonce as a way to get out of having to buy a ring and getting a tattoo instead. I dont recommend trying it unless you got Jay's type of money. Or maybe you can use the line that Method Man said in the song "All I need" Featuring Mary J. Blige, "Word life you don't need a ring to be my wife." But to be honest I doubt either will work but good luck with that!

--C-Recks--

Where Are They Now?

Have you ever heard an old-school or throw back song on the radio and you were left to wonder what ever happen to so and so? Or have you ever see an older movie that starred an actor or actress you liked but you were left wondering what ever happen to them? Or have you ever been watching sports and think like hey what ever happen to so and so he was the #1 draft pick? Well with this blog we will attempt to answer the question "Where are they now?" Through a little research we may actually be able to answer the question or we may find nothing and just further prolong the unsolved mystery of what happen to that particular individual.

Well in this edition of "Where Are They Now" we're going to profile rapper D-Nice.

Derrick "D-Nice" Jones began his career in the mid 80's where his friendship with the late DJ Scott La Rock would eventually lead him to joining Boogie Down Productions (BDP). Through his skills in "beatboxing" D-Nice earned the nickname "The Human TR-808." As a teenager Scott La Rock mentored D-Nice and he was allowed to hone his skills along side Hip Hop great KRS-One. However, tragedy struck the group as Scott La Rock was struck down by gunfire while attempting to defuse a threat that was made on D-Nice by some locals in the Highbridge Projects. After this tragedy D-Nice would go on the become BDP's DJ.

However, D-Nice's musical realm would eventually expand into production. After Scott La Rock's death and another tragic death of a teenager at a BDP and Public Enemy concert Krs-One felt empowered to form the "Stop The Violence Movement." The song "Self Destruction" was actually produced by D-Nice and Krs-One. The Self Destruction single was released in 1989, with all the proceeds being donated to the National Urban League. The song featured some of the Biggest Names in East Coast hip hop at the time including: Boogie Down Productions (KRS-One, D-Nice, and Ms. Melodie), Stetsasonic, Kool Moe Dee, MC Lyte, Doug E. Fresh, Just-Ice, Heavy D, and Public Enemy. The Stop the Violence Movement would go on to influence the creation of "We're All in the Same Gang" which was the West Coast version of Self Destruction.

After BDP's "Edutainment" album D-Nice went on to leave BDP to go solo, but always maintained an affiliation with the group. In 1990, D-Nice realeased his first solo album entitled "Call Me D-Nice" on Jive Records. The album was produced entirely by D-Nice himself, but the album's most successful single shared the same title as the album "Call Me D-Nice." The song sampled an organ from The Turtle's "Buzz Saw." The album went on to achieve RIAA certification: Gold status and topped out at #75 on the Us Billboard chart and #12 on the R&B/Hip Hop Chart. Other Singles from the album included "Crumbs on the Table" and "Glory." Glory and the video for the song was about the story of the the 54th Massachusetts Volunteer Regiment. The title of the song was the same as the 1989 Movie "Glory." Although the video for the song uses footage from the film "Glory," I wasn't able to find this song from D-Nice on the official movie soundtrack.

D-Nice's 2nd album was entitled "To Tha Rescue." This album would eventually be D-Nice's final studio album. Although it also achieved Gold status, To Tha Rescue was not as acclaimed as his previous release. However, it did reach #137 on the Billboard 200 and #27 on the Top R&B/Hip Hop Chart. The album featured singles "25 Ta Life," "Time to Flow," and "To Tha Rescue."

Unfortunately, after 2 fairly successful rap albums D-Nice's career as a rapper ended. There is no evidence detailing why "To Tha Rescue" was D-Nice's last album. Although unlike like what many may have thought, D-Nice did not fade away into the rap abyss filled with other retired and one hit wonder rappers. After doing some production work with artists such as Kid Rock, Nuttin Nyce, and High-Five, D-Nice did take a hiatus from the rap game. But in the late 90's he would used his influence in the Music Business to capitalize on the "dot-com" era and become an entrepreneur. In 2000, he first partnered with a New York based web development firm Boom Digital to help them become the first black-owned interactive firm to exceed $1 Million in billings. Digital Boom produced websites for names such as Aaliyah, Queen Pen, and Reebok. D-Nice would later go on to form his own company United Camps where he serviced such high profile clients as Universal Music Group, J-Records, Arista Records, and Violater Management.

In 2003, D-Nice decided to make his triumphant return to music, more specifically to Djing. He began to throw weekly parties where he would send E-Mail blasts featuring song lists and photography, which had been a long time passion of his. Well people began to take notice and his parties and photography gained more popularity. Eventually, D-Nice turned into a triple threat working as a web developer, photographer, and DJ. His photography would land work from talents such as Talib Kweli, Jean Grae, Gravvy, Lil Scrappy, Major League Baseball and G-Unit/Reebok. As a DJ he has performed for events sponsored by Star Jones, Mariah Carey, Stevie Wonder, Kid Rock, Counting Crows, and P.Diddy. Also, he has added corporate events to his resume for companies such as Sports Illustrated, Mac Cosmetics, Sean Jean, Adidas, Brand Jordan, Rolling Stones Magazine, Moet, Pepsi, and Paramount Pictures. Soon D-Nice plans on furthering his career behind the lense by transitioning to filmwork.

But what story would be complete without a little Love? As far as personal life, well D-Nice is presently engaged to Actress Melinda Williams. She is best known for her role as Bird in the TV series "Soul Food." Also, she has starred in such films as Sunset Park, A thin Line Between Love and Hate, High School High, The Wood, Idlewild, Daddy's Little Girls, and First Sunday. The two have known each other since she was 18 years old and have been dating since 2005. They were engaged last November and plan to wed next month (August) in Atlanta, GA.

For more information on what's new with D-Nice including parties, albums, and events check out his website and myspace page below.

http://www.myspace.com/dnicemusic

http://www.d-nice.com/journal/

C-Recks