Set It Off

I recently saw the above sign while I was in the bank a couple of weeks ago. I apologize that it's not legible. But I took a quick picture and that's the best I got. I don't think they take kindly to people taking pictures while inside of the bank. But for those that can't read it the sign says:

No Hats, Hoods, or Sunglasses

In an effort to better recognize and serve our valuable clients, please remove these items before entering. Thank You.

Now when I first saw this sign I was a little taken a back. When I saw the sign I was in front of the teller cashing my check and I was actually wearing a hat and hoodie at the time. I read the sign and then looked around to make sure security wasn't about to come tap me on my shoulder and ask me to remove my hat and hood. I finished my transaction and as I exited the bank. I hadn't paid attention, but as I left I noticed that the same sign was also on the front door. I attempted to take a picture of the sign, but then I saw the security guard start walking towards me and I thought I should leave right away. Black man in a hat and hood taking pictures in a bank probably not the best idea. However, the next time I was in the bank I took the picture above.

Upon analyzing the sign I first understood why the bank chose to implement this rule. Obviously a real customer won't mind removing these items. Where as, a potential bank robber will want to stay disguised behind their hat, hood, and or sunglasses. Nevertheless, I then began to think that this sign had some unrealistic expectations. First off, the day I went into the bank the temperature may have been 10 degrees max and probably closer to 0 with the wind chill factor. Therefore, having come into the bank from the cold my initial instinct was to stay warm and not to remove my warm clothing.

Likewise, the same goes for when it's summer time. I don't wear sunglasses, but I have seen people wear them indoors and outdoors. And I personally wear hats during any season and don't usually remove them when stepping into a store or bank. Now I've never attempted any bank robbery in my life, but I'd be 100% lying if I said it's never crossed my mind. Now don't get to thinking I got a criminal mind like I'm plotting in a basement like in the movie Dead Presidents or Jason's Lyric. But we've probably all been here before. You're in front of the teller and you're cashing your measly weekly check for whatever underpaid rate your job pays. Then one of the bank employees behind you brings a bag of money out [gotta be 10-20 stacks easy] and starts counting it in the money machine. You feel like "damn why they have to do this right in front of me?" Then right there for a split second that thought runs through your head. If I hop over the counter grab a bag and be out they won't miss it. LoL.

Okay well maybe I'm the only one and if that gives me a criminal mind so be it I'm just keeping it real. Of course I would NEVER in my life act on such thoughts; however, if I were to attempt something so foolish as bank robbery I think I would be a bit more creative with my disguise. The sign mentions NO hats, hoods or sunglasses. However, in defense of the banking industry, when I went to search for images of bank robbers I was shocked. The majority of the images I noticed were of individuals wearing just that a hat, sunglasses and or hood. Go figure!

Now it was my understanding that when you're robbing a bank the object is to get in get the money and get out without being caught or identified. We all know banks have cameras every where. Even upon entering you are being monitored for security purposes. I know that with sunglasses and a hat you can blend in with the regular customers and can get the drop on security. Thus increasing your chances of making it out of the bank before security is alerted. But what about in the long run? Are you really going to get away with this crime when your face is plastered over the evening news? Isn't someone going to say that looks like so and so down the block just with glasses and a hood on?But maybe I'm the only one that would consider that before pulling this idiot move.

Disclaimer: We at Brothers' Blog do not condone nor recommend anyone to utilize any of the information provided to try to rob a bank. It is illegal and just not a smart thing to do. This information is purely for entertainment purposes. Also, if I am ever accused of such a crime this blog shall not be used as evidence to self incriminate me. LoL.

Okay so below are some of the other more popular, weird and down right stupid bank robbery disguises I found while searching online.

Presidential Mask
I guess while you're stealing dead presidents what better to wear than a mask depicting some of our dead presidents right? I know of the 4 in the pic Carter is still alive. But I still say stick to the presidents of old when going this route. I don't want to see anyone robbing a bank with a Barack Obama mask on. Don't do our first black president like that!!

Stockings
Stockings are another disguise that don't really make sense to me. I mean you can see right through them. Although they do distort your image some what, if you know who the person is you will be able to tell it's them with or without the stockings on.

The Ski Mask Way

The ski mask always seemed to be one of the best ways to disguise yourself. All you can see is the eyes and the mouth. I guess it doesn't hide what race you are though because you can clearly tell this is a black man under this ski mask.

Bandanna
The bandanna was one used back in the Wild West days. Although this guy didn't tie the other over his face but just held it to his nose. Therefore he got the cool nick name "The Runny Nose Bandit." Yeah I'm sure a threatening name like that is gonna for sure keep his man hood in tact when he reaches Federal Prison.

Cross Dresser

This is a pretty extreme disguise of choice for my man right here. He actually dressed up as an elderly female. While no one probably expected him to rob the bank, I'm not sure it was worth cross dressing for. Unless that was something he already was into. Hey I don't judge anyone do what you do. LoL. But again in prison not sure if the "cross dressing bandit" is a cool nickname to have.

Motorcycle Helmet
Now I've never ridden a motorcycle before, but this was a pretty smart disguise. You clearly can't tell who the individual under the helmet is. Let's just hope he was smart enough to use a car for a get away vehicle as opposed to his motorcycle. Bank robber with a motorcycle helmet on a motorcycle sure no one will ever suspect that.

Muslim Garment
This clever outfit shows nothing but the eyes. She or he can walk into the bank and no one can say remove those garments to them. This is part of her culture and religion. However, as you can see the person under the garments used their culture to their advantage. Not to mention you can't even tell if the person under the garment is really Muslim or not. It could just be a regular American using this outfit to just rob banks.

Duct Tape
Now this on just baffles the hell out of me. Why the hell would this idiot try to bandage himself up like a mummy using duct tape?Now I know duct tape has 1,001 uses but I can't see bank robbery disguise as one of them. He would have been better off wrapping up in toilet tissue. I hope that he shaved every hair on his head and face before suiting up in this attire. Also, I hope for his sake that he didn't get caught by authorities wearing this duct tape. Because I could see them enjoying ripping every inch of that duct tape off his head. And if he did have any hair on his head or face prior to he definitely wont after this stuff comes off.

Fake Beard

Well what better way to disguise your face than to wear the fake beard and or wig? That way the authorities can never tell it's you once you're clean shaven. This guy sorta looks like Santa Claus on vacation with that hat and sunglasses. I hope he had Rudolph and the rest of the reindeer prepped to high tail it outta there once he makes his way out with his sack of money.

Doo Rag

Now I just found this funny because my mans just kept it all the way hood. He still rocking his doo rag and he threw on some stunna shades and tried to get away with robbing this bank that's obviously inside a grocery store. And doesn't that look like a work shirt from a local mechanic shop or something he probably works at? Come on bruh. SMH!

Not sure if anyone else have seen these signs inside of banks. But perhaps this bank is just getting ahead of the game. I heard recently on the news theft and shop lifting are up due to these tough economic times. So, I'm sure bank robbery probably has increased as well. But banks have been getting robbed since their inception. And as long as banks remain around there will always be some fool that takes the mere thought of trying to get rich quick to the next level. I guess at some point they'll be adding these other items to the list of No Nos to wear inside of the bank. But regardless of what your disguise of choice is, robbing a bank is just not a smart thing to do. You will eventually get caught and bank robbery = Fed Time. So that means you're doing almost day for day in the Fed. So in the end like Just Jasmine indicated in her recent blog it's just not worth it. Crime really does not pay. Did we not learn anything from Queen Latifah and the crew? Leave the Setting it Off to the movies.

--C-Recks--

A Thin Line Between Love and Inmate

With the emergence of the Internet as a tool to find love, there is no wonder why online dating services are thriving even in this recession bound economy. You can find any type of online dating website for whatever your dating preference may be. If you don't believe me just Google what you like along with the word dating and I bet that you find some online dating website that offers it. I have seen advertisements for BBW (Big Beautiful Women), Interracial, Gay/Homosexual, Christian, Ebony, etc. all over the Internet. Well there is a blog soon to come about online dating but I wanted to focus this blog on a specific area of online dating. I recently I saw a disturbing advertisement in a magazine. It was an advertisement for a Prison Internet Dating website.

Now this disturbed me for a number of reasons. First, I started to think that to me the Internet, much like cable television is really a luxury item. So, I began to wonder why on earth are my tax dollars going to anything more than the basic essentials for prisoners? For instance, food, water, bed, and some books. At the time I didn't even have Internet access and was sort of appalled that someone doing time in jail could access the Internet. I was not for sure if this was true or if this ad was some sort of scam so I decided do some research and find out if prison inmates do indeed have Internet access.

Well much to my surprise the articles I came across actually did prove the advertisement to be legit. There really are some states and some prisons that allow for prison inmates to have limited access to the Internet. Apparently those prisons that do have Internet but have strict guidelines and security measures and inmates are monitored while using the Internet. But most prisons choose not to allow inmates access to the Internet. There are many reasons why prisons choose to restrict or eliminate Internet use amongst prisoners. One major reason is pretty simple let us not forget these are criminals. So, there is a greater potential for inmates to use the Internet for criminal activity. The biggest fear is probably the possibility of inmates using the Internet to threaten or harass witnesses/victims and their families.

So what do these Jail Dating websites really do? Well at http://www.writeaprisoner.com/ inmates seek pen pals to write them. So the inmates place an ad on the site that includes details about them (some including the crime they were convicted of) and an optional picture. You can click on the inmate that interests you and there you have it their prison address. Send off your letter and then there you have it you have now made your connection with an inmate. Also, you have the option to e-mail a message and they will download and mail it directly to the prisoner. Seems like a pretty simple process. Also, http://www.prisonpenpals.com/ and http://www.inmate.com/ offer a very similar service. However, there are sites such as http://www.ladiesofthepen.com/ and http://www.cellblockmail.com/ that actually charge you a nominal fee ($5 and up) to receive the prisoners mailing address. The theory behind these websites is simply that prisoners are lonely and communication with the outside world is beneficial in the rehabilitation of the inmate. Also, we all know there isn't much to do in prison and as the old saying goes"an idle mind is the devil's playground."

The problem with some of these pay sites is that some of them are total scams. To be honest if you're really looking for a prison inmate to connect with and write most local and state corrections facilities have websites. For instance, you can search for prisoners inside any Illinois Corrections Facility simply by logging on their website. They list along with the inmate's picture, their full name, age, height, weight, types of tattoos, and the crime they are convicted of and the expected release date. Of course it also lists their inmate # and you can obtain the mailing address if you really wanted to write them. In fact, I would go as far to say that if dating inmates is your thing then this would be a better and safer route than using any of the aforementioned websites. The reason being, that on those websites you have no way to verify if the information listed is accurate. So if John Doe lists on inmate.com that he is in jail for robbery serving 5 years how are you to even know if this is true? It could be that John is really serving 25 to life for murder. I would say verifying the information about the prisoner would be the way to avoid possibly being scammed.

Snail mail or mail sent through the U.S. Postal Service has dramatically decreased over the years. With the ability to E-Mail, instant message, text, and pay bills online, most don't really find a need for postage stamps anymore. Hence, the constant rate hikes on postage stamps. Also, e-mail has become the most preferred method of contact when it comes to mail. To demonstrate this fact I have 2 key examples.

First, my 4 year old son was recently talking to my aunt on the phone. And some how she mentioned she wanted him to mail her some money. Well he agreed and said I will and asked her what's your E-Mail address? No he didn't ask her physical address. At 4 years old he's up to date on technology and has no concept of postal mail.

The next example deals directly with the topic at hand. My brother was recently requested by a female friend of his that was incarcerated to write her in jail. Well he asked me if I had ever written anyone in jail and what should they even say to the person incarcerated. Well I first had to even think when was the last time I even sat down and wrote a hand written letter. To my recollection it had been probably at least 5-7 years. But much like my son was thinking, I said if the letter can't be e-mailed there's a good chance you're not getting it from me jail or no jail. LoL. Well to make a long story short he never sat down and wrote the letter. She wrote him a few times pleading him to write back but he just couldn't do it. Well when she got out of jail the first thing she asked was "Why didn't you write me?" Sadly to avoid hurting her feelings he lied and said he did write and it must have been somehow lost between the mailbox and the prison.

But I think it's safe to say that many people are like me and rarely take the time to write a letter to someone in prison. I'm sure it somewhat has to do with not knowing what to really say to them. This is probably a good reason why some inmates receive little to no mail while incarcerated. But of course when they get out of jail just like my brother's friend did they will ask "Why didn't you write me?"

However, the Federal Bureau of Prisons (The Fed) has come up with a way that can maybe combat this problem. They have introduced a program called TRULINCS short for (Trust Fund Limited Inmate Computer System). This system allows for inmates to have limited computer access where they send and receive e-mails without having to access the Internet. The system is in a limited number of BOP facilities but is expected to be in all facilities by 2011. Basically the way the system works is this. The inmate must request to have a person added to their [prison] approved list of contacts. The system generates a request to that person advising them that the inmate wishes to communicate with them through e-mail. Once the recipient approves they can then begin sending e-mails. All correspondence is monitored, the e-mails can not exceed 13,000 characters (approximately 2 pages), and no attachments can be included. And I'm happy to report that funding for TRULINCS is not provided by tax payers. In fact, funding is provided entirely by the Inmate Trust Fund, which is maintained by profits from inmate purchases of commissary products, telephone services, and the fees inmates pay for TRULINCS.

So, one of my main questions is what is the draw to dating someone in prison? I mean it's a little bit different if you're already with that person and they happen to go to jail then and you just want to stand by your man or woman. However, I'm curious to know, has the dating pool been so depleted that we are now resorting to searching for available bachelors and bachelorettes in jail? Or is it a deeper reason why individuals will search for convicted felons to date? I recall on an episode of the sitcom "Seinfeld" the character George was dating a woman in prison. He stated that it was the perfect relationship because "he knows where she is, doesn't have to worry about the pop in, and has little competition." LoL. Regardless of the reasoning behind searching for a companion in jail I guess the main point is there is someone for everyone. This includes prison inmates. I mean everyone needs love right?

--C-Recks--

Finders Keepers

So I'm walking home from work one day last week. And about 10 feet in front of me I spot something. Nah it can't be what I think it is who would do such a thing. It's even harder to tell if it's really what I think it is because it's in the grass. So, I keep approaching. At about 5 feet away I realize it is indeed what I thought it was. So what to do? Well if any of you have been in this situation then you know that you must react in a certain way as to not make what just happen seem obvious. So at about 3 feet away I'm completely focused on this object like an Eagle about to swoop down and grab their prey. Please keep in mind that with all this stuff running through my head it seems like minutes have passed by, but in fact this has all taken place within a matter of about 10 seconds. So as I'm about a foot away I keep walking past the object and in one motion reach down and pick it up without even missing a step.

So what did I find? Well I'm sure by now you've all guessed it. Yes it was money. The coveted green back, the root of all evil, the almighty dollar, some cold hard cash, dead presidents, or whatever slang term you want to use. Yes, there in the grass I actually found $7 whole dollars, a $5 and two Singles to be exact. Just laying there folded up. Yes I know I'm a rich man so feel free to form a line around the block to get a loan. Although it's nothing major it's also nothing to sneeze at either especially in today's economy. I mean if I walked up to you and said here's $7 for nothing are you going to refuse it? Alright then! I didn't think so. So now you're probably asking so, "What's the point? You found $7 whoopti damn doo. Did you take the time to write a blog just to brag? LoL.

Well as I stated when I originally spotted the money it was a matter of seconds before I was upon the money and picked it up. So, as I recollected on this story I just found it funny that there is actually a procedure one goes through when they find money. Now if you don't believe me just keep reading. I'm willing to bet that if you've ever found money (at least $1 or more) that you've done at least one of the things I mention. For further evidence of this please take a look at the video at the end of this blog. So here's the step by step instructions on what to do when you find money.

1. Spot the Money! - I spotted the money (which we all know is green) in green grass. Luckily it wasn't tall grass (which I hate. lol) so it wasn't hidden. However, from 10 feet away some eyes may not have spotted it until they were closer. But it goes to show that we all know money when we see it. So, what happens when you first spot what you think to be money? Well first I would say we all get anxious; however, we all deal with it differently. As for me, I tried to play it cool as to not tip anyone else off that I spotted some was money. I could have easily ran to the spot in the grass but in an effort not to tip someone else off to the money I chose to play it cool. But you better believe that inside I was "So Anxious" like Genuwine.

2. Look Around!! - Prior to picking up the money, most will take a long look around their surroundings. Why? I mean you found it so why should you look around? Well the answer is simple. Although you are finding something, the majority of people for some reason feel like criminals especially when finding money. So they will look around to make sure that no one is spotting them picking up this money. Some of the more considerate individuals will even look out to make sure no one else is about to claim the money before they pick it up. As you can see I pretty much skipped this step all together. But I did a little looking out in the 10 seconds it took me to walk up to money if that counts at all.

3. Pick it up!! - So you've spotted it and done the recon and no one is watching you or around looking for the lost money. So now all that's left to do is pick up the money. Seems so simple right? Well if it was I wouldn't be writing this would I? Lol. I guess there are plenty techniques one could use to pick up the money. But the object of the pick up is to be as inconspicuous as possible. The more obvious you are the greater the chance of someone spotting you and possibly claiming the prize before you. As you can see from my story I picked up the money and didn't miss a step in my walk. Even if someone was paying very close attention to me the entire time they would not have been able to tell what I picked up or that I even picked up anything at all. So whether you bend down to tie your shoe or use the old gum on the bottom of the shoe trick just make sure you're not obvious in your actions.

4. Look Around Again!! - So you've got the money in hand now what? Well you can't just walk or run off. You've got to again look around to make sure you get to keep your prize. I mean if you happen to stand up and the person who lost it hovering over you, there is a chance you may catch a mouth shot depending on how much money it is. Therefore, you have to look around again just in case you have to quickly toss it back down to where you found it.

4a. Also, under this step of look out you should take note that you may want to also look around to make sure there is no more money lying around. There could be more money a few steps ahead or to the side. So make sure that you're not leaving money around for someone else to find.

5. Flee The Scene!! - Now as I stated although this is not a criminal act (that is as long as the money isn't found inside a bag marked FDIC) it is sometimes treated as such. So once you have the money in hand you can't just be lallygagging around the scene of the "find." I don't mean that to say that you should run away like Carl Lewis but at the same time you should make some kind of a move.



6. Count Your Windfall!! -

Please do not attempt to count your money until after you've fled the scene. Again if you're sitting there with found money attempting to count it you may be subject to someone saying "Hey that's mines!!" However, once you've mad it a safe distance from the scene of the "find" then feel free to get your count on and see just how much you've come up on.

Now if you're anything like me then these are the steps you'd take. If not exact, then some sort of variation of the above steps at least. However, some of you kinder gentler souls with more integrity can always attempt to find whose money it is. You know walk around asking if anyone lost some money or even put up signs around the area where the money was found. Just keep in mind if you ask me I'm liable to say yes knowing damn well I didn't lose any money. Lol.

But in all honesty I do have some integrity and if someone had asked me if I found or saw $7 I would have given it to them. Plus I'm attempting to teach integrity to my son, so I have to lead by example right? However, if I found $65,000 like the lady in this story [below] I can't 100% say I'd have as much integrity as she had and give the money back. But bless her heart for her honesty. For her efforts she was even rewarded $5000 and a free trip to Walt Disney World Resorts. But I'm sure she'll have to pay taxes on that $5000 though.

http://www2.tbo.com/content/2007/oct/15/turning-bag-cash-pays/?news-breaking

But even as a small children we're taught the simple phrase "Finders Keepers Losers Weepers."
Now I'm sure you're all wondering what I did with the $7. Well in an attempt to flip this $7 I somewhat invested the money. As Nas said in his song Life's A Bitch "that buck that bought the bottle could've struck the lotto." Although I could have used a nice cold 6 pack of beer after a long day of work, I played the Mega Millions instead hoping that I would have a story to tell when I won. Well someone definitely won the $84 Million that night. But of course it wasn't me or else I wouldn't be telling my story in this damn blog. Instead I'd be on TV holding up a big check and telling it. LoL. So I guess I invested the $7 in the Illinois Education Fund. So to that person that lost the $7 just know that it went to a good cause.

--C-Recks --

"Dollar on a String Trick"

(Pay close attention to how they attempt to pick up the money)