Monday, December 1, 2008

The First Should Be Last?!?! Part 1

Alcohol is a part of the Williams way of life. I grew up with a Grandfather who was a serious alcoholic. I mean, the absolute worst. My Grandfather was known for actually staying drunk for 2 weeks at a time, sometimes longer. (And when I say 2 weeks, I mean 24 hours a day for two weeks straight). Growing up watching this, it was more a spectacle than anything. My Grandfather was a gentle drunk. Well, that is to everyone other than my Grandmother. So my impression of alcohol wasn't terribly jaded.

So it didn't take me long before I became curious of alcohol and its effects.


Date: Fall 1993


Location: Canoga Park, California


The first part of this story that you have to understand is that in my freshman and sophomore years of high school, I missed a lot of school. Probably at least a third of the time. This day was no exception. My guy Edwin and I did our usual that day. Leave for school around 7:30. Hit the local donut shop for several games of Streetfighter II. After wandering around the west valley, we found out that there was a ditch party at the house of one of Edwin's friends. We didn't have anywhere else to go, so we walked the couple of miles to dude's crib.

When we got there, it turned out to be a bunch of white people there. Now the school that we went to was mostly white and latino, so it really didn't bother me the crowd that we would be hanging out with. About an hour after our arrival, someone started going around and asking people what they wanted from the liquor store. At this point, I had only drank the occasional wine cooler, and one time I drank some of my Aunt's brandy. (With orange juice no less, yuck). But people kept placing their orders, so when it came my turn to order, all I could get out was "Get me a 40". Pay attention to the year this occured. At that time, all I knew was that they drank 40s in Boyz N The Hood, so I said screw it. Well, that elicited this response from the Beer Man "What kind of 40"? Damn, I'm stuck now. I thought that 40 was the brand name. Goes to show what I knew then. Just so I didn't blow my cover, I replied "it doesn't matter". I hit my man with a $5, and he was gone.

About, oh, 30 minutes later he returned with a box holding everyone's drink orders. He passes everyone their drinks, and when he gets to me, he hands me a 40. of MICKEY'S! (Goddamn white boys). So I open it, and start to drinking. It couldn't have taken me but about 20 minutes to drink that whole 40. And back then, I was relatively skinny. (15 years old, 5'9" 130lbs.). So all the liquor rushed to my head. As I now know, I was buzzed at that point. In my mind though, I needed more alcohol.


There were some people who were doing shots of KAHLUA! (Again, Goddamn white boys). I decided to join them. I had probably 3 shots. It didn't taste like much to me. By this point, some of the black people from our school showed up. And that's when the fun really began. They brought, wait for it......... 40 ounces of, wait for it.......... OLD ENGLISH 800! Ah yes, what I now know is the real deal. One of the brothas handed me a half a 40 of Old E, and dared me to take it to the head. Again not wanting to be considered a punk, I downed it.

Well, that was more than enough for me. I had reached my limit. Feeling good at that point, I was ready to get back to school. (I needed to get back for 5th period because if I was absent, the teacher was under specific instructions from my father to call him). Edwin was able to secure a ride from one of the brothas for us back to school. This was a serious mistake. My man couldn't drive. We took all back streets to the school, and I swear dude was taking turns like a Nascar driver. 5 minutes later we arrived at the school. At this time, I'm really feeling the alcohol. Dude tossed me around something awful. So we walk to our cafeteria, and meet up with these two girls Julie and Cindy. (I had a serious thing for Julie at the time, which is ironic because Edwin wound up marrying her. Ain't life funny?).



Not two minutes into the conversation, I had to excue myself. I began to stumble to the restroom. I didn't make it. I got into the restroom, but I couldn't get to the stall. I threw up all over the restroom floor. The nerd kids used to hang out in there, so luckily for me my reputation wasn't harmed by me losing my cookies in public. I went back to the cafeteria and finished hanging out with Edwin, Julie, and Cindy. Even though Edwin wasn't in the restroom, he knew I had called Earl. (Or called for short). And he put me on blast like NASA. I was the joke for the rest of the day. I don't know how I made it through the rest of the day. I went to 5th and 6th period, and took my ass straight home after school. I had a serious hangover.

I swear after that day, I said what everyone always says: "I'm never drinking again"! And to be honest, I didn't really drink much until I was 23. That's when I moved in with a bartender, and I've been good friends with alcohol ever since. But not Mickey. 15 years later, I'm still holding a grudge!

-DrizaDre-

Disclaimer: When I say "Goddamn White Boys", I don't say it to be offensive. The video explains how I mean it.

video

24 comments:

neema divine said...

lol...that was one heck of an experience.

Mizrepresent said...

Oh you are bringing me back here....Mickies and Old English...or did you say Old English...if you didn't then oh well i'm dating myself...and you know what, i don't care! lol, my first time here, thanks to CLNMIKE, but i'll be back.

clnmike said...

OLD ENGLISH 800!!

Man that was my first, I tried it a couple of months ago just to see and almost threw up off that mess.

Some memories should stay in the past.

Free Reggie said...

DEEP! My folks drink "Old English"....

Aretha said...

I've never had either, but neither mickey or Old E sound very friendly...lol.

That Kat Williams clip had me over here rolling...seriously. LMAO

Sexxy Luv said...

Beer?...YUK! i never even taste that stuff before, the way it looks is the turn off for me. lol

you are so lucky you made it through the day without your dad finding out. that hang over was enough punishment i bet! lol

Just Jasmine said...

LMAO @ calling Earl.
LMAO

n0days0ff said...

That was too funny, I got stupid drunk a few months ago and swore never again. But after a while I started back, but just not as hard

Just Jasmine said...

btw i know someone clicked some flicks...
I'm gonna need to see the evidence

Cas... said...

O.K. Now that's a story to remember! LOL! I've never heard of a ditch party. That's too funny!

I never saw that clip. Katt Williams is a fool!

CC said...

You started early drinking. I was and am still a light weight. I didn't really drink until 21 (yeah, I was a goody goody) and still have to be careful of my drinks because it doesn't take much for me to get a buzz. (I have a friend who get's tipsy after only two, count em, two mixed drinks).

urbanknitrix said...

Memories. **raising my hand** I too am a victim of the Mickey's, but mine was in one of those green little aluminum cans.

Dang ditch parties, they were the best, I wish I could have one now and leave work.

This July I decided not to drink any more afer losing memory.....

That worked for about a month. Remy anyone?

wordsmith said...

lmao. who is that comedian?

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

I rember them mickey's big mouth and you know, in all my life i have never attened a school that was not all black, not even college

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T said...

PS: and private stock and pony piss (colt 45)

Bahama said...

Now i want a drink...

pink said...

lmao...yeah my first time bein drunk was new years that just past. I was 21 (getting ready to turn 22 in march) and me and my gurls went out to celebrate the new year. I had 2 long islands and 2 double shots of patron...DONE! lmao...I promised myself that I would NEVEr get that drunk again..its not cute and it doesnt feel good.

I dont drink beer tho...its tastes like i would imagine cat piss would taste like...lol everyone always looks at me funny when i say that.

Teems said...

"You gon need them muthafuckas!"

Damn, you werent lying about having drunken episodes...I feel better! :-)

Untouched Jewel said...

And you was in my stompin grounds of the Valley gettin your drunk ass around?! LMAO. Too funny. Be glad ya daddy didn't catch you.

nikki said...

BWAAAHAAHAAHA@ya drunk ass. i've never drank old e or micky but i'll drink the SHIT out of a 40 of michelob.

have you ever gotten that drunk again?

T. Michelle Theus said...

LOL @ you asking for a 40 because of Boyz N the Hood! Idk what it is about that Old E, man. I don't drink anything but I have an uncle who gets full on that Old E and then he's out there knocking out street lights with his bare hands. lol No lie!

ToshaRenelle said...

I can't do beer! The smell and the taste alone...mmm *shakes head*, I'm so straight, LOL!

I think everyone has had that teenaged experience with drinking and trying to be grown and we didn't know shit!

Fun read!

Tuotierugif >^..^<© said...

hah! thats a classic you gotta tell your grandkids to warn them about drinking! lol

ANGELINA said...

i'm still laughing about the nerds hanging out in the bathroom...they weren't good enough for the cafeteria? haha!

and being that i was in a sorority, i have many similar stories from college...i've learned my lesson though.