Showing posts with label man. Show all posts
Showing posts with label man. Show all posts

Friday, February 13, 2009

Reserve the Right

Well we all know that Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Now if you don't then you obviously don't watch TV, listen to the radio, or use the Internet frequently. Because the advertisers sure aren't allowing you to forget even if you wanted to. So basically if you aren't aware then you do not exist. If I had a dollar for every KY or Lovers Lane commercial that I've heard or seen this month I could afford to make it rain at the strip club for more consecutive nights than it rains in Seattle, WA. But I digress. LoL.

Speaking of Valentine's Day and marketing I'm sure this is one most of you have heard of already. However, I first heard of it a couple of years ago. My best friend sent me a picture message with the caption "Only in Chicago." Well I was at first shocked by the picture I saw and thought it was a joke. So I had to do further research to confirm that it couldn't just be a Chicago thing. Upon further investigating online it seems as if this was a yearly tradition that spanned far beyond Chicago. What is it that I'm referring to you ask? Well take a look at the picture below.




That's right ladies and gentlemen. Every year (at least recent ones) the hamburger chain White Castle goes high class for Valentine's Day. From 5-9 pm you and your date can enjoy the famous sliders in a romantic setting. Yes that means they cover the tables in plastic table cloths, put a flower on the table and even light a candle. They even provide servers for the evening. But here's the kicker you must make a reservation to enjoy amenities such as these.


WTF??

Alright seriously I like to save a buck just like the next American struggling in these economic times. However, I just need to know what man in their right mind is actually bold enough to make this move? I mean on some real I respect they gangsta to even have the balls to tell their woman "I made reservations at our favorite restaurant," and then pull into White Castle. Talk about being in the Dog House, they may as well serve up divorce papers along with this meal. "Would you like to see the dessert menu, and the number of a good divorce attorney?"

Now in the past I've had some women tell me that I don't seem like the romantic type. Ironically, I'm probably the total opposite of what they thought. I guess I was just never given the opportunity to show it. Either that or never wanted to show them that side for whatever reason. However, my sometimes unappreciative ex could attest to the fact that I am definitely romantic. But in recent years (the last 5...yes sad I know. Don't judge me. LoL) I have been single. Therefore, my Valentine's Day routine has been to take my mom out for dinner. But even if all I had was $1 to may name I wouldn't even take moms to White Castle on Valentine's Day. Come on now.

In their defense, from what I read many of the couples that frequent their local White Castle on Valentine's Day may have originally met at the restaurant. As cute as that may be let's be realistic. Plenty of couples meet in many strange or obscure places. However, some of those places don't need to be revisited on a regular or even yearly basis. Here are a couple of extreme examples. Let's just say a couple happens to meet at a friend's funeral. Does that mean every year they should visit the cemetery and have a picnic on the friends grave site? That's creepy as hell. Or how about this I recently saw a couple on Divorce Court and they met in a strip club. She was a dancer and he was a bouncer. Although they were divorcing, what if they had stayed married? So you mean to tell me when they're 70 years old and gray they should be visiting the strip club as part of a yearly tradition? If I see someone's grandma on the pole on amateur Wednesdays I'm going to jail for disorderly conduct that night. Lmao.

In closing, if any of you guys are last minute and haven't made reservations anywhere, please do yourself a favor and cook dinner or order in. Do not under any circumstances call your local White Castle for reservations. But regardless of what you have planned I hope that everyone enjoys their Valentine's Day. Even if you are single and have no Valentine just do something to show love to yourself. It's just another day you'll survive. Hell I have for 5 years strong. LoL. However, I am happy to report that this year I am actually going on a real date for Valentine's Day. I've made reservations at a downtown restaurant with a nice romantic setting. Maybe I will give details at a later time. But I don't plan on breaking tradition, I will still take my mom out maybe for breakfast or lunch though.

--C-Recks--

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Repost: Best of Both Worlds

Since today is SuperBowl Sunday I thought this old post from September would perfect to repost today.

There's a new White commercial that has been recently airing. I wasn't able to find the video online so you'll have to settle for my description. If you need to view a previous version of the "when the crave calls" commercial click the link. They're all virtually the same basis just with different scenarios. The basic premise behind this particular commercial is this. A guy and a girl are on the couch and look to have just been "fooling around" and the girl says "I'll be right back and don't you go any where." Basically she's letting him know that she's going to go slip into something a little more "comfortable". Well as she walks away the guy's cell phone rings. Well the caller on the other end is not really a person but the crave calling him to come eat White Castles (cue the music). The man tries to reason and explain that it's not a good time right now. The music plays again indicating that the crave is very insistent on him coming right now! Unable to resist the crave, and in true fictional fashion the guy chooses to answer the crave and runs out of the door. Just as he exits a scantily clad female walks out wondering where he went.


Now yes the commercial did bring about a bit of a laugh. But one of the times I saw this commercial I was on the phone with my brother and we were both watching the same Chicago Bears game. Well of course he agreed just as probably any guy that watched this commercial would and said there's no way that they would choose hunger over even the slightest possibility that sex is going down. Especially in the case of the commercial where this man was 99.9% golden pending he wasn't one of those unfortunate men that require a little blue pill and forgot to take it. LoL. Being of the male species I can and will keep it real with you. Let's say a man just got released from being held hostage for months I'm talking having been starved and tortured John McCain style (We've all heard the story by now). However, upon his release if you immediately put on a table a sandwich (with the works ham, turkey, salami, cheese, bacon, etc.) and next to that sandwich a naked woman I'm willing to bet all I have that 90% of the time the man will take the naked woman. Now perhaps midway through handling his business he may take a quick bite of the sandwich to keep his energy up, but the initial reaction is all the evidence I need to win the bet. LoL!

Well I thought that my theory was bullet proof like 50 Cent, that was until someone posed this question to me the other day. I will attempt to phrase the question just as it was stated to me.

"Let's say it's Super Bowl Sunday and you're having a Super Bowl Party. So you've got good food, lots of beer, the big plasma TV, some good friends and family and the most comfortable seat in house all ready for the Big Game. What if right before the opening kick off your wife or girlfriend calls you to the room. You run to the room as to not miss any of the game and upon entering the room she greets you naked and wants you to have sex right then and there. What do you do?"

Now unlike my previous example with the food vs sex, for some reason I was just a bit puzzled as to what my answer would be. My very first thought is what kind of nymphomaniac freak have I married or gotten involved with that would even put me in the position to make this choice? LoL. I mean does she not know that I have watched game after game week after week (16+ in total) in order to see this one game? Does she not know I've watched my favorite team lose heart breaking games and even perhaps miss the playoffs this year? If she's my wife or girlfriend then she has to know all of this. So why oh why would she do this to me?

Alright I know this is by far not the worst position to be put in world but still it's a decision that I would prefer not to have to make. I can see the angel and the devil on my shoulder trying to get me to choose sides. Except in this case I don't know which is the good side and which is the bad side. But on one side there's a man with a football referee uniform on and the other is a woman with an angel robe on and a cheerleader outfit under it. Now both have valid arguments as to why I should choose one over the other.




Ref: Why are we even having this debate we've done the coin toss time for the kick off get out there on the field game on!! (Blows whistle).

Angel: It's sex!!

Ref: That's all you have to say to plead your case? It's sex? Would you tell her to put some clothes on and come back out here so you don't miss any of the game.

Angel: It's SEX!!
Ref: Is this really your argument? So you think that just because it's sex he's supposed to miss the biggest game of the year? You bought that 55inch Plasma screen just for this game!

Angel: Let's Talk about sex baby... (Singing the words to Salt and Peppa's song).

Ref: See this is B.S. it's Super Bowl Sunday. You have cold beer, snacks, and the best damn sporting event waiting on you what's to think about?

Angel: S.E.X. take a deep breath and think before you let it goooo!!... (Singing the words to Lyfe Jennings' song).

Ref: (Blow Whistle and throws flag!!) Personal Foul unnecessary singing!!

Angel: Listen this is all I have to say. No, it's not sex again. But there's a beautiful naked woman here ready and willing. Now you mean to tell me you'd rather watch a man take a snap from behind another man when you could be taking your own snap with her as your center?

Ref: Man she's your girl she's not going no where why does it have to be now? How about you sacrifice the half time show. (Whispers: Don't worry Janet Jackson isn't performing this year) You can come and finish this then.

Angel: Oh trust it'll be too late by then and you'll probably be sacrificing about a months worth of sex and your bed. So I hope that Lazy Boy is extra comfy.

Ref: (Blows Whistle) Injury timeout on the field. Get my man an ice pack for his future blue balls!! Because we're still going back to watch the game right?

Angel: Okay here's the last chance and the last option for you. Tivo or DVR. You do your thing here and when you get done go back and rewind the game and watch from the beginning. You'll both be happy, she gets what she wants (sex) and you still get what you want (the game). You can skip the commercials and the half time show and come back and watch them later and by the end of half time you'll be back watching the game live. So what do you say?

Ref: I think I saw a challenge flag thrown.

Me: Well she does have some valid points I think I'll take her last option.

Ref: After further review of the play the ruling on the field stands: This is some bullshit!!

Angel: No man can resist you were fighting a losing battle.

(Both poof and disappear)

Well in actually the thought process of that decision took a matter of a few seconds but believe it or not all of those things went through my head before I gave my answer to the question. The DVR option was in fact my final answer by the way. Thank God for technology. LoL. But on the real I just can't imagine being put in a situation such as that. I mean I love Football and sports but does it outweigh a man's desire to want to have sex?





Before I go just just a quick word of advice to the ladies. Please don't do any nonsense such as this to your men. Now if it's preseason, even regular season then let's make it happen, I'll even miss the whole game. And although it's a stretch, I may even make an exception for the playoffs. But on Super Bowl Sunday this is just torture. Although most will choose the sex option there will be plenty of resentment behind it. And no offense he's not doing it because he wants you oh so bad at that moment. It's because he doesn't want to face the possible consequences of choosing football over you. So a simple solution to this is to go ahead and watch the game with him. You may not know what the hell is going on but just sit quietly and ask very few questions during the game. When he cheers just cheer right along with him. Keep a cold beer near and a few snacks within arms reach. And if he's happy with the outcome of the game celebrate with him and if he's sad or upset just don't bring it up at all. If you can do this one thing then trust and believe your man will do anything you want the day after the game. His honeydew list will be completed and he'll be rubbing your feet and feeding you grapes. Well maybe that's a stretch but he will appreciate this gesture and you will be rewarded generously for it.

P.S. To the guys. You know how they say most guys break up with their girlfriends before Christmas and stay single until after Valentines Day? Well the Super Bowl is usually before Valentines Day. Hint Hint. LoL.

--C-Recks--

Friday, November 28, 2008

Any Given Son Day

November 28, 2008

Dear Son,

It was almost 5 Years ago to the day when your mom and I realized you were indeed on your way. It was November 29th 2003. It was around 1am in the morning. I was up late as always, but I can't recall what I was doing. I believe your mom was sleeping. However, something awoke her. I'm sure it had something to do with you moving around. She said she had to use the bathroom. So I helped her up and as she stood up she said I think I peed on myself. Well she then went to the bathroom to clean up. But she came out and said I don't think this is pee. After making a call to your grandmother and to the doctor she was able to determine that a portion of her water had broken.

So we packed up and drove to the hospital. Your mom did all the hard work I just tried to be supportive and not get on her nerves. But almost 22 hours later at about 10:50pm that night you were born. I remember when your head popped out, the doctor pulled you out, and your eyes were wide open and you looked right at me. In between tears I smiled, as the doctor wrapped you up and handed you to your mom. She quickly called me over to hold you as well.

It was hard to imagine that I had spent almost 9 months talking to you through a barrier of stomach that grew by the day. You used to kick whenever I talked to you. But then and there I was holding and talking to you in the flesh. I had overwhelming feelings of joy, happiness, nervousness and even fear. Yes me the self proclaimed fearless man was scared at that moment. The thought that your life was essentially in my hands had me scared to death. The thoughts of what kind of father I would be to you, and would I be able to do this job forever had me fearful. But I vowed to you even less than hours old that I would do any and everything to take care of you and be there for you.

Well it didn't take too long for me to get the hang of the parenting thing. However, there was trouble on the home front. I can and will explain to you the entire story as you get older and are curious as to what happen. But a long story short your mom and I ended up splitting up and eventually divorcing. I had to make some of the hardest decisions of my life during those rough times, but in the end I feel like I made the best decision when considering you. It was difficult to make such decisions and not want to be selfish. However, I had to take a look at a much bigger picture which went beyond just myself.

You may hear different variations of the story when you get older, but I have no problem being open and honest when you're able to handle it. You weren't old enough to remember your mom and I ever being together. Which in part I find a good thing most times. The way your life is now is how you have always known it to be. So you don't remember some of the back and forth and changes that took place back then. Regardless of what has taken place, just know it had nothing at all to do with you. And in many ways what took place forced me to be the man I needed to be. The man I needed to be for myself and for you.

When I think of you being five years old it is still hard to imagine. Time flies is all that I can say. I mean I can truly recall it all like it was yesterday. From your first words (which were da da don't let anyone tell you different), to your first steps, your first fall (I dropped you), and recently your first dentist trip (I took you, poor thing you shook like a leaf you were so scared). I've made sure that I have been there every step of the way. Not only financially, but also physically and emotionally there as an active father in your life. Besides a hand full of weekends out of town and when for whatever reason your mom had something else planned, I don't/didn't miss a weekend spending quality time with you. The same goes for calling and talking to you on a nightly basis.

Over these five years I've watched us begin a bond as father and son that is undeniable. I wouldn't give it up for anything or anyone in the world. It reminds me of how I was with my father when I was a kid. Unfortunately, that relationship slowly whithered away over the years due to some circumstances that I will reveal to you later as well. But I vow to you that I won't let anything get in between us remaining close and me being a constant in your life. In the next 5-10 years I'm sure you'll be experiencing many more firsts. Including, your first day of school (real school), first crush (Kim Possible doesn't count), first heart break (sad to say but it's going to come), first fight, etc. Just know that you will have me there for you and there to help guide you through each of those events and more.

I love you so much and I am so very proud of you. And even prouder to call myself your Dad. I wish you the happiest 5th birthday ever and so many more to come.

Love,

Your Dad.


--C-Recks--

Monday, November 17, 2008

A Dog Day Morning

No offense to any animal lovers or anyone that may work for PETA or PAWS or something, but I'm going to start this off by saying something. I hate dogs! Well not exactly hate, I know that's a strong word. But I don't like them and or have a strong disregard for them.

I know that may sound random as hell, but here's what prompted me to say this. I decided to come to work and do some overtime on this past Saturday morning. There were a few of us in the office working. Well for some damn reason my manager chooses to bring her dog to work with her on Saturdays sometimes. Don't ask me why please don't. But anyways I over heard some of the coworkers talking about the manager is coming in and bringing her dog. I say "she must of thought I wasn't coming in because I told her once about that dog."

On a previous Saturday about a year or so ago I'm sitting at my desk working and I hear some damn barking. Next thing you know this 70lb or so canine runs past our office. I'm like WTF? Sounding like the song "Who Let the dogs loose?" *Woof Woof Woof Woof* Then the dog proceeds to come in our office and is sniffing around. Then he comes up to me. I proceeded to say "Can you please get your Dog? I don't do dogs." That was the nicest I could put it considering it was my manager and I was at work. Had I been in the streets I may have said "You better get this MF-ing dog the hell away from me." So I think I was pretty nice about it considering. lol.

Well the manager then says "I will keep him up front with me don't worry." So, I mumbled under my breath oh "I'm not worried." She then does something unthinkable. She picks the dog up and is holding it as if it's a baby. If you could see her with this bag ass 70+ lb. dog in her arms patting it on it's back and rocking it, you would have had the same WTF look on your face. She then proceeds to talk in baby talk to the dog saying, "you have to stay out here because he doesn't like you it's okay girl mommy still wuvs you." Now I never even talked baby talk to my son when he was a baby. Me and his mom both agreed that was a no no! So I couldn't fathom a grown ass woman talking to a dog in baby talk. I guess like Jay-Z said "I'm like a dog I don't speak but I understand, where my dogs at..."

Well when the manager came in this past Saturday there was no dog with her. I guess someone must've got her the message that I was in the office. Now I'm sure some of you are reading and asking yourself what's so wrong with a dog? Why don't you like them? I will say this in their defense. I don't really like any pets. However, if I'm ever ballin' and on MTV Cribs the only pets I will have are some fish. You know those tight ass fish tanks the stars usually have. But I'll have enough money to pay someone to care for it, so I won't be the one changing the water and all that. lol. But just so you know I don't have a fear of dogs or animals, nor am I allergic to them. I simply don't understand what all the hype over them is. Man's best friend? I think not. I already have a best friend. Nevertheless, the main reason I don't care for them is because there are just some things that I will never get when it comes to people and their dogs. Below you will find my list of those things.


Treating dogs like kids
I understand that not everyone has children. In the case of my manager she does not. Therefore, her dog is like her child. Although some treat their dogs as a member of the family, it's not a child. Come on there is a big difference. When it's cold outside I make sure I dress my son warmly so he doesn't get sick. Whenever I see a dog wearing a sweater I just never understand it. I mean I'm not the smartest person in the world, but didn't God give certain animals fur for a reason? And isn't that so that they can withstand extreme temperatures? I mean I never turned past the discovery channel and saw a polar bear rockin a hoodie or a penguin in a scarf. Why? Because God created them to withstand the cold. I know it's more about the dog owner than the dog being cold. They think it's cute. No difference when parents dress their kids up in funny clothes when they're babies. On babies it's cute but on a dog? Come on now.


Let Sleeping Dogs Lie
Why on earth you would let a dog sleep in the bed with you is beyond me. I've known and heard of couples that literally have their dog sleeping in between them. Most dogs are outside at some point in the day, so unless you put shoes on them too they can't be too clean. Also, they s**t and don't wipe. And you mean to tell me you're comfortable with waking up to a dog's ass in your face? Or what about when you and your significant other want turn over in the middle of the night and get a little frisky? You may feel someone licking your face, but it may not be the person you want. LoL.





Kissing the Dog
Speaking of licking your face. I would have to say that a dog licking your face has got to be one of the most disgusting things ever. I don't know if it's just a myth portrayed on TV or not, but don't dogs drink from the toilet? If so why the hell would you want that same tongue licking you in your mouth? I mean really think about it. If you an absolutely fine (wo)man came up to you and asked can they french kiss you right now, most would answer Yes! But what if they said but just so you know I just drank water out of a toilet? I highly doubt most would still want that kiss. So how is a dog any better or cleaner in that respect?


Pick it Up Pick it Up
Now I know that most dog owners adhere to this law and clean up after their pets handle their business. However, those that don't deserve more than a fine if caught. Why should I have to be subjected to possibly stepping in dog s**t if I walk through some grass? I mean when my son was a baby I threw his stinky pampers in the trash not on the ground for someone else to pick up or step in.




Doggy Day Care
I recently overheard a co-worker saying something to another employee about a doggy day care. Apparently one of the amenities of this Doggy Hotel is that they have a streaming web cam available so that you can view your dog on-line at any time. Sounds like a great idea right? Well I went on the site link above to investigate how much such a service would cost. How about the fees are $35 a day or $460 a month. Now as a parent I can only compare this to the cost of day care for children. Which can average from $600 a month or more depending on the facility. I don't know about anyone else but I haven't even heard of a kid's daycare having such a service. I'm sure that many parents would love to be able to view what goes on in their day care facilitiy while their at work. But again that's one of my problems with dogs, some people treat them equal to or better than humans. Some of these doggy hotels even offer traditional spa services such as aroma therapeutic massages and pawdicures. Can a dog really get that stressed out that they need a massage? You have to be kidding me!


Michael Vick
Finally, speaking of Dogs getting treated better than humans... You should have known it was coming when I started talking about the subject of dogs. But we all know the story about Michael Vick and his sentencing to 23 months in Federal prison for his role in the dog fighting conspiracy. I'm not trying to say that what Vick and his co-conspirators did was right. It was definitely illegal and absolutely immoral. And as much as I don't like dogs I definitely wouldn't want to see any animal abused or neglected. However, the problem I have with the Michael Vick situation is that to me it seems that the dogs have been somehow humanized. I mean how many cases have we seen and heard of where a terrible crime has been committed, but the offender(s) are sentenced to little or no time? Take for instance the case of a man that was convicted of only 60 days of jail time in Vermont back in 2006. Believe it or not the man was found guilty of having sexual contact with a 6 year old girl over the course of 4 years. I know that different states have different laws, but 60 damn Days? WTF? You mean to tell me that dog fighting is a worse crime than sexually assaulting a child? That's just a damn shame. It's just a dog!!

Well I could go on and on about expensive Vet bills, dog whisperers, and buying gifts for dogs, but I think you get my point by now. My dislike for dogs isn't from any tragic experience as a kid or anything like that. I just can't for the life of me comprehend why some people go to certain extremes for their dogs. It's fine to have a dog but I say please treat them as a dog not like a human. They're pets and should stay in a pets place.


--C-Recks--

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Scavenger Hunt

So I got an e-mail yesterday from a girl I used to talk to a few years back. It was a surprise to even hear from her considering we hadn't talked in over a year. So we e-mailed back and forth a few times and caught up. She asked the usual catching up questions about career, kids, and love life. I answered each question. And in turn asked her the same questions. She answered all in detail; however, when I asked about love life she said uhhhh and hesitated. In the back of my head I'm thinking uh oh that's not good. But she proceeded to tell me she had been with her man for a year now and how things weren't going well and why. Now I didn't ask for all these details, but she felt the need to tell me. So I simply listened to all she had to say but I didn't say anything back to her about her situation. But then I began to think more about it and well now I have this to say.


To my fellas you better get on your A+ Game!!! If you got a good woman I'm telling you now don't slip up. Take it from a man that's been through it before. Let my pain save you from the same fate. There are men out there as we speak that are just waiting on you to mess up. Unfortunately if you've already messed up well you better get it together and real quick. I know this doesn't apply to all women, and I'm no expert but I feel like the majority of women fall into this category here. Those women aren't going to leave their man or cheat on him just off G.P. Women need a good reason in order to just mentally justify it within themselves. The fact is that any average to good looking woman is going to be pursued all day every day by men. Whether she is at work, at the mall, at the grocery store, walking down the street, or on the Internet a guy will be trying to holla. So therefore, if her man is on his job she may hear these advances but they go in one ear and out the other. However, let you start slipping up. Oh you better believe her ears will start hearing it all and worse than hearing it she may act upon what she hears.

Now the reason I call them scavengers is because just like real scavengers in the wild (i.e. a vulture or a hyena) they prey upon the weak, hurt and or dead (which can all be describe the status of your relationship). And as soon as they see an opportunity to swoop in and get your woman they will definitely take it. No man (unless you're a scavenger yourself) appreciates nor really likes the scavenger men. But they're a part of life. And unfortunately you still have to respect they gangsta! As it was once told to me in so many words "Yo chick chose me." LoL. Just look at the example I opened with. Luckily for her man I'm not one of these scavengers or else she would have given me all the info I needed to make my next move my best move.

But again all you can do is be on your A+ Game at all times and set the bar high enough that no other man can even reach what you do or will do for your woman. As they say one man's trash is another man's treasure. Or what you don't appreciate someone else will. Choose whatever clever cliche you want to use, but it all boils down to the same thing. Betty Wright gave the female's perspective on the same topic and warned about the "The Clean Up Woman." Well unfortunately these scavengers have constant ammunition they can use to shoot game at your woman. And it comes in the form of song lyrics. We've all heard these songs before. But don't let one of them come on when your woman is next to you and you know you have messed up. Oh do I feel for you. LoL.

So, with that said we've compiled our Top Ten songs that talk about taking another man's woman! (Could be your woman...)


#10 - Chris Brown - Ya Man Aint Me
Even the young'n Chris Brown is no fool when it comes to knowing what to say to get to another man's girl. As you can listen in the song he tells the young lady "giving you things to think about cause I know what's up) Since he aint tryna step it up, don't you think you should give him up?" See a lot of the times the only goal is to plant a seed in the mind. He's simply making a suggestion. By the time he reaches the chorus the lyrics state "Stop tripping, I know you got a man but girl he's slipping, I can see myself gettin in where I fit in." And I'm sure that by the time he gets to the bridge he's managed to change her mind. "You and him aint meant to be together, life with me will be better. Yes, let him leave you'll be doing yourself a favor girl I'm just tryna save you." This was very smooth, he even managed to cover up his actual intentions by making it as if he's playing captain Save Em'.



#9 - Keith Sweat Feat. Keyshia Cole - Love You Better
Keith Sweat has been begging since the the 80's. Well he's back this year with a new album and on it features this little gem of a song. He teams up with Keyshia Cole as he puts her man on full blast. Check out the lines of the first verse: "You need to go and let him know right now. ‘Cuz he don’t even know how to make you smile. Y’all don’t even makin love, see it’s over baby. He spend all his night at the strip club. When what he got at home girl is real love." Now I'm not mad at anyone for going to the strip club but how is he gone put her man's business out there like that. And further more I'm just curious how he knows how much time he spends at the strip club unless he frequents the same establishment. The chorus gets to the point and lets her know what her next move should be. "Go and tell your man that you’ve found somebody new.
Go and tell your man that you’ve found somebody who. Go and tell your man that you’ve found somebody, Who can love you better, I can love you better."


#8 - Jesse Mccartney - Leavin'
Now here's another unique strategy of scavengers. Jesse Mccartney doesn't really have a valid argument in this song as to why she should leave her man (not one that he mentions at least). Therefore, he resorts to flaunting all he has to offer. "You make me want to take you out and let it rain (make it rain). I know you got a man, but this is what you should say." And once again there's instructions on what she needs to say to her man in the chorus. "Why won’t you tell him that... I’m leavin', never to come back again, You found somebody who does it better than he can No more making you cry, no more of them gray skies, Girl we flying on that G-5, G-5
And we're leavin', never to come back again, So call your shorty and tell him you found a new man. The one that so, so fly, The one that keep you high... Don't Stress Girl you deserve nothing but the best." Again I don't know what this girl's man did besides probably being broke but sometimes that's enough to cause you to slip up.


#7 - Sam Salter - Once my S**t (Always my S**t)

Well Sam Salter brings us to another version of the scavenger. This is actually one that you should already be leery and aware of. It's the Ex. Although he should technically be out of the picture lets just say he can easily find his way on the scene especially if you start messing up. His only hope is that you're messing up worse than he did to lose her. And in this song Sam quickly makes it known that he's waiting on his opportunity to get her back. "I heard you found someone new, he's runnin round town just frontin' on you." The 2nd verse gets a little more personal. "Did he see your tattoo? With my name written all over you. I know that he hates me, cause he can't replace me. Cause in the end I'm the one for you." Well it doesn't take long for Sam to re-mark his territory. The chorus goes as follows: "He can't do it like I do, I do, I do, No I don't give a damn who's hittin' it, I don't give a damn who's workin' it, even if he's kissin' it. Cause once my S**t ...always my s**t!!" Unfortunately you can't erase history and if you slipping up history will repeat itself but not to your benefit.


#6 - Joe - Treat Her Like a Lady
#6 was originally going to be a different song by Joe "You Dropped your Dime." However being unable to find the video to go with the song we decided to switch to a different Joe song. Although it's not quite about him taking another man's girl it's still extremely relevant. On "Treat her Like a Lady" Joe is actually doing the same thing in which I am and giving men some advice on how to prevent them from losing their ladies. Joe immediately begins by asking a series of questions throughout the song. " Tell me when was the last time, you brought her roses home from work. Tell me when was the last time, you rubbed her feet when she said they hurt. Tell me when was the last time, you bought a card to tell her how you feel. Don't even know when was the last time, you lit a candle for a late night meal."Yeah I'm sure that will hit home with a lot of you men. But don't for a second think that's it, the chorus pours even more salt into your wound. "How long will it be before you treat her like your queen. And how long will it take, before she starts coming home too late. And how long will it be, before she starts running in the streets. You better take the time to treat her like your lady." A select few of you even get a little reprieve when Joe states "Now if this don't apply to you, keep doing what you do. But if the shoe fits you well, take a minute and just ask yourself." All I gotta say is if you don't listen to me at least listen to Joe.




#5 - Mario - Let Me Love you
Mario didn't hesitate to immediately let the woman know that her situation with her man just isn't what it should be. He opens up the song stating: "Baby I just don't get it do you enjoy being hurt? I know you smelled the perfume, the make-up on his shirt. You don't believe his stories you know that they're all lies. Bad as you are, you stick around and I just don't know why." As if that wasn't enough to plead his case the chorus to the song goes on to state "If I was ya man (baby you) Never worry bout (what I do) I'd be coming home (back to you) Every night, doin' you right. You're the type of woman (deserves good thangs) Fistful of diamonds (hand full of rings) Baby you're a star (I just want to show you, you are)."


#4 - Jagged Edge - He Can't Love You
"I aint no hata or nothing but he can't love you like I can. Trust me" What a way to start off the song. It definitely sets the tone for JE to not "hate" on her man. Apparently they're playing the role of the Ex and they've let their girl slip away. Now they're trying to pull a move like Sam Salter was in song #7. The chorus says it all: "He can't love you like I love you Baby you know it too. And you should never wanna be with a man If he can't be a man And do the things to you like I can."


#3 - LL Cool J Feat. Boyz II Men- Hey Lover

LL has been writing songs for the ladies since the 80's. Hence the name LL (Ladies Love) But he definitely took it to a new level when he teamed up with Boyz II Men to do "Hey Lover." In a random encounter on the street LL sees a woman and from the onset he plans on taking her from her man. In verse one he states "I gotta take ya from your man that's my mision, If his love is real he got ta handle competition." Then next on his agenda is to build his case as he explains "you only knew him for about 5 months (that's right) besides he drinks too much and smokes too many blunts." Also, he states "I see you at the bus stop waitin everyday your man must think its safe for you to travel that way." But he does digress stating he's not trying to violate her relationship. Although most of L's song is a fantasy of what he would do or say to the woman it's still realistic in the fact that it's exactly how it happens.


#2 - Tre Songz - Can't Help But Wait
The person that wrote and or produced "Can't Help but Wait" must have also had something to do with the aforementioned "Let me Love you" by Mario #5. If you listen they both virtually sound the same. Although the concept is the same, Tre Songz approaches it just a little differently. "I see you, you're with him - he ain’t right but you don’t trip You stand by, while he lies - then turn right 'round and forgive. I can’t take to see your face, with those tears run down your cheeks..." Even though those words sound just the same as all the other songs the chorus is where he differentiates himself. "Girl I can’t help but wait Til’ you get back with him, it don’t change. Can’t help but wait Til’ you see that wit me it ain’t the same. Can’t help but wait Til’ you, see you, for what you really are Baby girl you are a star And I can’t help but wait." So Tre is basically saying he already knows she's going to stay with the guy even though things are bad. But even still he's going to wait for her to see it herself. Just like the others Tre says "And I don’t wanna come between you and your man. Even though I know I treat you better than he can." Then to add insult to injury he flosses a little in the 2nd verse. "You’re a queen, you should be, getting all that someone’s got. You should be rocking the latest in purses, bracelets, and watches, your're worth much more than an occasional I love you." So even after laying out his plan he is going to still be there waiting even when she doesn't choose him. But he still warns her "Get it together you can do better."


Alright we're down to #1. I'm sure you've been wondering what # this song was going to come in. But here it is the #1 song about taking another man's woman. Drum Roll Please..




#1 - Joe - All the Things your Man Won't Do
Well the title alone tells you what the topic of the song is and also explains why Joe comes in at #1 with this song. He gets right into the topic at hand with the first verse: "Tell me what kind of man would treat his woman so cold treat you like you're nothin' when you're worth more than gold. Girl, to me you're like a diamond I love the way you shine a hundred million dollar treasure I'll give the world to make you mine." Then Joe pulls out pure game when he says this line in the 2nd verse "What good is a diamond nobody can see it I hear he got you on lock down but I got the master key!" Bam! He got her right there he doesn't even have to say anything else. But why not keep going while you got her on the ropes just to officially pull her in. "I'll light a thousand candles all around. Show me to the subway, I'll go down. Nothing can be sweeter than the sound of making love." But don't think he's done yet. Joe does a little bit of over kill here at the bridge "I'll make your body cream with my sex machine I won't stop until I hear your mother scream." Making yo momma scream? Damn! Well you can see and hear for yourself why Joe is #1.


In conclusion, I can't say that all the men that fit the category of scavengers even try to do it on purpose. Sometimes it's just a crime of opportunity. No different than a man walking past an armored truck and the back door being unlocked and the bags of money are just sitting there for you to take they may as well be gift wrapped with a bow. Yes they are still committing a crime which is wrong but their intentions from the beginning weren't to rob the armored truck. They've probably never committed a crime in their life, but sometimes when it's presented to them so easy they can't help but to take advantage. So to my fellas out there make sure you take heed. It's never an overnight process and it can be happening as we speak maybe you're just not paying close enough attention. It always starts off as just friends or someone to talk to and vent to about how you messed up. You know an occasional shoulder to cry on. But you better believe the scavenger is simply playing his position just for the time being. But as soon as he sees an opportunity he will swoop in and quickly turn those things she hates about you into reasons why he should be her new man. Please believe it...

--C-Recks--

Friday, September 26, 2008

Man Up!!! Part 14

If you've been paying attention to our weekly Man Up Rules then you know we're coming up on a Milestone today. That's right we're at Man Up Rule #50. When we first started doing the Man Ups we maybe had about 10 of these rules in mind. So the other 40 have come simply from things we've seen and noticed. I hope you all have been paying attention and avoiding violations. We may or may not continue to post Man Ups on a weekly basis. But we'll see if we can keep it going and hopefully reach 100. But without any further ado it's time to Man Up!!! Remember this blog represents what we consider to be Man Up Rules. So, each week we'll add to the list just based off of our observations and perspectives. So be sure to check back weekly. Note: Most rules apply to men/boys age 13 and older (except where noted). Also, the rules are in no particular order.

Man Up Rule #49:
Now there was a time when leather was the in fashion. But as of now no man should be caught wearing leather pants (Image 1). The only exceptions to this rule go to Bikers (Image 2) and Rock n' Roll stars (Image 3). Also Image 1 is a double violation to Man Up Rule #32, as you can see his shirt is unbuttoned.

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(3-Sting)

Man Up Rule #50:
All men have at some point been put in this awkward and uncomfortable situation at some point in their life. Whether it be their mom, grandmother, girlfriend, or wife someone has asked them to hold their purse and they were not able to say no. Well the way you hold the purse could be considered a Man Up violation (Image 1&2). Or holding it wrong could cause someone to think you have a Man Purse which violates Man Up Rule #33. I'd suggest the double hand grab. Imagine a running back taking a hand off the way he holds the football (Image 3). It will difficult for someone to see exactly what you're holding. LoL.


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Man Up Rule #51:
Although we would never call out a whole musical genre, there is one particular type of music we have a problem with. It's not the music itself because all music is a form of creative expression. However, Techno Music for some reason brings about a let's just say funny form of dancing. Check out the video below for further evidence. So to play it safe men should not dance to Techno Music.





To Be Continued...

Brothers' Perspective

--C-Recks--

--Driza Dre--

Friday, September 19, 2008

Man Up!!! Part 13

Here we are with the latest edition of our Man Up Rules. If you haven't been paying attention you may want to take heed as to not violate any of the rules. Remember this blog represents what we consider to be Man Up Rules. So, each week we'll add to the list just based off of our observations and perspectives. So be sure to check back weekly. Note: Most rules apply to men/boys age 13 and older (except where noted). Also, the rules are in no particular order.



Man Up Rule #46:
Although the rapper Lil' Mama made a song about it, it didn't apply to men. No man should be caught wearing lip gloss! (Image 1). It doesn't matter if it's winter time and your lips look as chapped as Malik Yoba's (Image 2) do lip gloss is not an option. If it's that bad keep licking your lips like LL Cool J (Image 3). All forms of Chapstick and Carmex are acceptable substitutes.

(Image 1)


(Image 2)


(Image 3)



Man Up Rule #47:
I once went to a full service barber shop and got a hair cut from someone that was not my regular barber. Well the barber asked me if I wanted my hair washed? Of course my response was an instant NO! Now if the barber had've been female I would have been all for it. But a man should not be washing another man's hair. That is way too much personal contact. Even if that was my profession, as a barber I would do like your mom used to do when you were little. Tell them to hold their hand out and squeeze you some shampoo in it and point them in the direction of the sink. LoL.




Man Up Rule #48:
Although the whole trend of wearing Stunna Shades was a big thing a couple of years ago, some of ya'll got a little out of hand with it. Not all stunna shades are made for men to wear (Images 1 & 2). As a matter of fact most of them should be banned all together. As you can see some of them bear a resemblance to the kind of glasses Elton John (Image 3) wore back in the days. And we all know Elton's status.

(Image 1)


(Image 2)


(Image 3)





To Be Continued...



Brothers' Perspective



--DrizaDre--

--C-Recks--

Friday, September 12, 2008

Man Up!!! Part 12

Welcome back to another edition of Man Up!! If you're new to the site we try to come up with new Man Up Rules each and every Friday. Remember this blog represents what we consider to be Man Up Rules. So, each week we'll add to the list just based off of our observations and perspectives. So be sure to check back weekly. Note: Most rules apply to men/boys age 13 and older (except where noted). Also, the rules are in no particular order.



Man Up Rule #43:
No grown ass man should ever be caught sucking his thumb!! First off you're too old to be sucking your thumb (the 13 and up rule falls to 12 and up here). Second, it just doesn't look right. What you and your thumb do in the comfort of your own "crib" should stay there and not on public display.





Man Up Rule #44:
Who doesn't like a nice relaxing massage every now and then? I've always been pretty good at giving massages and at one point I wanted to be a massage therapist. However, that was until I figured out taking those classes I'd probably have to give a massage to a man at some point. Well that ruled out this choice of occupation for me. A man should never receive a massage from another man (Image 1). I don't care how much pain my back is in if my only option is to receive a massage from a man then I'll just have to stay in pain. There's always the option of a self massager. (Image 3).

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(George From Seinfeld)


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Man Up Rule #45:
It doesn't matter how stylish these shoes are or the brand name associated with them a man should not be wearing heels (Image 1). They simple were not made for men. The only passes in this case go to Prince (Image 2) his music is timeless and those are twins in the picture man! Also, a 70's pimp gets a pass for having worn platform shoes (Image 3). Lastly, image 4 is a double violation of Man Up Rule #33 notice he is wearing a man purse.

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Brothers' Perspective

--Driza Dre--

--C-Recks--